Rewrites

I hate it when I get stuck on a rewrite. I’m working the with same material I’ve been working with for the first few drafts, but the rewrite is killing me. I need to get in contact with other people in the valley and discuss the cannabis situation. I’ll call it that from now on, if I remember.

Speaking of Cannabis, it looks like Ron Paul didn’t get that much support in the Valley, even though a banner was draped over the expressway bridge. That was the scene on election day, on expressway 83. Some crazy things. Ron Paul was the godsend for a lot of people, but I didn’t trust him. Those who spoke to me about him said he wanted to get rid of the “unconstitutional” drug war. But it wasn’t just that I was focusing on. Abortion is always my target, however, it isn’t the most important.

To know a guy supports the legalization of marijuana by potentially ending the war on drugs at the price of women’s rights was always wrong to me. I just didn’t like the guy.

He was just shifty.

Perhaps, if I cared enough, I would’ve called Ron Paul’s campaign and asked their viewpoint on the religious use of cannabis. However, I didn’t feel I should sink that low when writing this, even though it may have been for the best to get valley supporters. I think just focusing on those who use cannabis for that reason should be the prime focus of my article, which should have been finished so long ago, but health and now emotional problems have become problematic.

And speaking of relationship problems, I had a talk with Jyg. I guess it was my mindset that did us in. I don’t want to be the guy who fucked this up, but without the cash and the job, I can’t do anything for her. I need a job and I need one now.

I know what she wants and I know what I want and they’re not that different. However, I am scared about the whole thing. I’ve seen people who are proud and get into this situation and regret it later. I don’t want to regret it. I never want to regret it. I’m just so confused.

“Cannabis Gospel”

The article’s on its fifth draft. It’s almost finished, but I still need to weed out some of the words that made it lengthy. I’ve gone from 2000+ to just under 1300. I need to remove 200 words and then we’ve got the final draft. Hopefully, I didn’t take out anything important. I’m thinking of writing a similar one on Associated Content, but who knows.

The title took a change going from the working title “Vision Quest,” to the more humorist title “Cannabis Gospel.” I seriously don’t want the whole thing to make it sound like I’m promoting it. However, in many ways, I think I am. Not because I’m a stoner, because I haven’t touched cannabis since 2004 and I don’t plan to touch again, but because the world needs this. This country needs this. We need to remove all the clutter of bad emotional thoughts and have a new zeitgeist. No more blind faith. No more evangelicals on TV preaching for money.

Moving on: Nueva Onda Poets’ Society has been reinvented. And while founder Amado doesn’t call it that, those of us who were concocting without him thought it was a great idea. Now that he’s back in the scene, we’re happy.

Last night, however, didn’t turn out quite the way I wished it would. The scene was great, but Jyg wasn’t there. I’m afraid without her there supporting me, then I shouldn’t even bother. I know that’s pretty stupid to think but that’s the way I feel. She’s my balance, my rock. While some of you have religion, I have Jyg.

We were supposed to hold a memorial service to Raul Salinas, but  Amado said he’ll hold another one in actual memorial for him. Which is good because the Chicano Poet needs to to remembered. If not for the world to morn, then for us to.

Which brings me to my other topic. I uncovered an essay I wrote for my South Texas Writers course. I’m thinking of revamping it and posting it on Associated Content as well. I know I should try to do something bigger, but these writings should be free to the public and not kept inside a magazine that’ll cost and arm or a leg, or not in stock at your local bookstore. A printed copy may exist, but it’s doubtful.

However, I know how I want to start it off:

“Somos Chicanos. We are the those shoved in the corner and forgotten. We are the ones whose parents swam across the river, whose land was stolen, who has survived on broken promises.”

I’ll be sure to link it here when I’m done.

“Vision Quest”

I finished the article. I finished it around five. It came out longer than the first incarnation of it, which isn’t good news. Now I have to edit it down a few thousand words to make the proper word count. So much has been taken out of it already that I feat that it’ll suffer a lot of information if I do any more to it.

I suppose I want to continue on with the project. Continue writing it, make it longer than just an article. El Senor said he’ll be doing research on it because I caught his attention. He just likes smoking it because he knows it gets to me. I haven’t touched the stuff since 2004 and I don’t plan to return to it like a baby to his bottle. Not that I was addicted to it, I was a casual user. Now with Adam around, I’d feel like a jerk if I abuse it.

Anyway, I’m wondering if Adam’ll lend me some of his books so I can study up on the whole thing and write pieces. Too bad I won’t get paid for it if I do. Unless I add a little widget on here that you can donate money–but I kid.

I’m going to read “Cannabis Yields and Dosage” by Chris Conrad later on.  I borrowed it from Adam, wel, I think he gave it to me, but I think I can return unless he printed out a new one. The link above leads you to a PDF file of it, free online. Had I known it was free, I wouldn’t have taken his.

Anyway, back to the writing process. I get off topic so badly, I suppose that’s why I write everything down first and then type. This whole blogging thing is bewildering to me. I suppose I could plan out each post, but then I’m not being honest with you.

Writing, process, okay.

I never like doing my own editing, but depending on the editor alone is a freelance no-no. David used to get upset with me when I pulled that shit with The Paper. Old habits die hard, though. I suppose I could always sent it off to Abby in Waco because she’s cool like that, but she has enough on her hands, what with her student’s assignments.

Editing is hard because I can’t choose what is important and what is just poetry. David, by the way, loves the poetry, but if the piece is cluttered with it, the length runs too long and the information suffers. Rewording things is another thing. Writing for mass media normally means to dumb things down. I’m not good with that because then I get carried away. There has to be a time when you’re just insulting your readers, something I don’t like doing.

Take out the poetry, I suppose, but not too much that it reads like a regular newspaper article–we’re cooler than that.

However, the one line I refuse to remove is:

“But marijuana, cannabis, hemp, ganja, pot, weed, wacky tobaccy–call it what you will–has always been around.”

That line stays because it works for me. And it’ll probably work for David because he’ll believe that while I take Adam and Shemshemet seriously, that I don’t really buy into the hype.  And that my friend, is how I sell an article. I get close to my subjects because I want to get in depth with them. I want to understand. That goes against most journalists because of conflict of interest. But I want the people to know my subjects. I’ll follow them around for a few days, talk to them, run through their myspaces; when interviewing them, I let them talk, let them ask questions. The second interview is always about the questions from me, if there needs to be a second interview.

I understand I’m doing this wrong; I’m being an amateur. But in the long run, those who read the pieces will understand the subject. However, this pattern only works when I’m enthused about my topic, rather than something I get because no one else wanted it and, fuck, I need the money.

Anyway, it’s late. I must go.